Sgt Curt Boehme

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The cop rap

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Well you broke into my party, and what did you do? You took away my Crack pipe, you drank up all my booze. You put a rubber glove on, you slid em up my dress  At the same time I took a little piss like this... (Refrain) Well eat, bite mother fukkr, gobble nibble chew, Moose pud kitty spray finger fuck you Sheep's pussy,  camel toe, eat a 'ho's clit Po-po's nottin but pigs lying shit. Well everyone everyone's ass was bare No one standing but the Sergeant over there The whole damn thing didn't phase her a bit She just jumped in the pile and landed on a dick (Refrain) Ofc Witt is not a sports fan,  but she plays with balls whenever she can. Because her favorite sport ya see, Is playing tonsil hockey  (Refrain)   
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it's a wonderful world....Thank you Officer Merak Ziegler!

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Somewhere over the Rainbow/It's a Wonderful World During Gay Pride, 2020, I had gone to The Storehouse food bank to pick up a copious amount of food.  A case of Ensure® energy drinks was also part of my cache.  Who better to give this to, except The Albuquerque Police Department, who was working extra hard that day.  The exception was Sargent M. Martinez and Lieutenant Lawrence Monte, along with an unwilling APD K-9 whose name I won't disclose, a hamster named Richard Gere and a black hamster named Kobe Bryant that came with his own call letters on the bottom of the bird..DNOCD... Definitely Not Our Class, Dear. Let's just say there was a lot of give-and-take at that party.  Beer, red wine, asparagus, fruits and little teeny tiny shriveled nuts were served.  Oh and jalapeño almonds and Wasabi in case Officer M.Rico stopped by because he's half Hispanic and half Hawaiian.  And I could see his religion from 20 feet away that day, so I assure you ladies..and I...
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Ebullience

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I am touched beyond words for the acts of kindness Bozeman Police Department since I have arrived. What happened last night and early this morning just blew me away.  When I arrived at my tent on fowler and Laramie near the mall, my tent had not only been set up,  but a foam pad and my quilt...complete with skidmarks and dental impressions resembling #105 and #119 on the corners.   Those boys and girls in Blue had a time whilst I was crossing town to get my gym clothes and attempt to ride my bike back to the Pond.   I had hoped Chief Knight was going to tuck me in and read me a bedtime story...or at least some beat [sic] nick poetry...so I'll have to be the Daddy, here: There exists a kind Andy Knight That for a phallus,  he used dynamite.  They found his rear molars Just this side of Boulder And his anus got shot down in flight.  "Pull!" I couldn't figure out what was taking the Chief so long inside Walmart and then when I unfurled the foam ...
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